Hurricane Heist - D-

​Quick Hit: Is it possible to be dumber after a film?

2018 has brought us a variety of movies – from some original horror films to some throwback action movies that feature that most elusive of genres – crime capers, where a giant scheme is pulled off by unwitting bad guys or good guys gone bad. These were probably at their greatest point in the early 2000s/late 1990s, and grew Hollywood with the mid-budget blockbuster. A couple of these came out this year as well – Den of Thieves, and today’s film The Hurricane Heist.

The premise is an example in terrible scripting. Will (Toby Kebbell of Dawn of the Planet of the Apes) has become a meteorologist because his pop died in a hurricane. He is prognosticating a hurricane of unbelievable proportions in a little town that his brother, Breeze (for real) happens to live in. There also happens to be a government currency shredding facility in the little town, and a bunch of bad guys that have decided they are going to take the money. However, gutsy little Federal Agent Casey (Maggie Grace of Lost) has changed the codes on the doors, and the generators are down, and the only mechanic left in town is Breeze. Oh my goodness. 

Ya, outside of just the “turn your brain off and WATCH THIS!!” nature of the film, I didn’t find much to enjoy in Hurricane Heist. In fact, I thought it was really dumb, and the dialogue features some of the worst that I’ve heard outside of London Has Fallen. There’s also the premise, which somehow trivializes the effect that hurricanes can have on people’s lives. It starts off well and good – with the devastating loss of their father – but then the hurricane just becomes another excuse to hurt people. If the film had gone full Sharknado, it might have gotten away with this. But by trying to toe the line between serious and goofy, it doesn’t go far enough to be enjoyable in any sense.

The acting isn’t terrible. If anyone shines, it’s probably Ralph Ineson as Perkins, the “big bad” of the gang. He actually is fairly convincing, and seems to know what type of a movie he’s in. He needs to be larger than life and achieves it by simply yelling or grunting most of his lines. Not sure if he’s ever been in a James Bond film, but he may have a future if he wants one as a villain there.

So yes, I wouldn’t advise this one. It’s just barely watchable. I’m giving it a “D-“.
 
For more on this film, check out IMDB.